From the daily archives:

Thursday, February 19, 2009

If you are going to effectively communicate with someone it is imperative that you ensure that they are both hearing and understanding what it is that you are saying. Unfortunately this is very difficult to know for two important reasons: 1. We have developed incredibly powerful subconscious and automatic social mechanisms that help us to facilitate the flow of conversation. Head nods, “uh-huhs” and “mmm’s” are a few of the automatic and more often than not, meaningless recognition gestures that we use. These types of gestures are generally for the purpose of buying time and keeping rapport while communication is [...]

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Due to the harsh realities of the world and the undeniable necessity to have a mentally stable “human” in order to pass genes on from generation to generation, the evolution of a mind that can ward off negative emotion is one of the end results… There are five major factors that are working constantly to assure that our concept of self and our sense of reality stays in check and there is a sixth mechanism that helps to facilitate their usage during communication. Let’s discuss these first and then we can get into the practical mechanisms we can use to [...]

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Literally, the most difficult challenge in communication is in ACCURATELY representing and EXPLAINING the concept or feeling that you are currently experiencing. Without extensive analysis and research, the average person is completely unaware of how INACCURATELY they are communicating their thoughts. Thanks to evolved processes such as heuristics, metaphor and analogy, stereotypes and predictive categorization that occur during experiential and language processing, we are still able to make functional sense of each others communication. Suffice it to say though, that when you are describing a night out with the girls… The visual, auditory and somatic/kinesthetic representations that your mother is [...]

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