Communication is the physiological and verbal manifestation of the string of thoughts being constructed in the mind of the originator. In other words, what you say and do while speaking to someone is the RESULT of a thought or string of thoughts. Just like communication, all of our other actions are the manifestation of the thoughts we have. The underlying theme of importance is that thoughts CONTROL AND DICTATE our actions.
When we are attempting to persuade someone, what we are in effect trying to do is dictate and control their thoughts…
The result of which will hopefully be the action that we want. So let’s discuss “thoughts” a bit more to help you understand what is going on in someone’s mind while you communicate with them. Then we can get into some specific patterns that can help you to literally change their thoughts.
Although a thought is represented as a cloudy, intangible, atmospheric “something” in our mind, it does indeed have a shape or a home per se. The physical form of a thought is what is known as a neural net. Well, more specifically a thought is what can arise when an electrochemical signal is fired through/into that neural net.
A neural net is the grouping of a number of neurons in the brain that have “fired” together (in sequence) one or more times and as a result have formed a chemical bonding of sorts. What happens is that each time an electrochemical signal is sent through the network there is an exchange of different chemical components at the synapse (the gap between the dendrite (receive signals) and the axon (send signals).
The exchange of these chemicals between neurons “strengthens” the connection between each of these neurons and as a result makes the exchange of the electrical signal across the synapse “easier” to occur. As a result of the ease of usage, it becomes the “go to” thought, habit, belief, etc… Imagine you have a bucket with 2 holes in the bottom of it, one hole is larger than the other one. Each time you pour water into the bucket, more water runs through the larger hole. This causes more erosion around the hole, making it larger and as a result more water runs through it. Pretty soon, almost all of the water is running out of that hole because it is so much larger than the other one.
This hole that has become so large and gobbles up all of the water is the neural equivalent of a habit or compulsion.
Now in order for that hole in the bucket to BE a hole, it has to have a perimeter… Without a perimeter, you have either a completely unbroken bucket bottom or no bottom at all. There is no in-between. Thoughts and neural nets act in EXACTLY the same way. In order for a thought to be “that exact thought”, it needs to have a perimeter within which this neural net exists. This means that specifically, exactly, acutely a certain number of neurons fire together in order to create each thought. The specific number, kind and sequence IS THE PERIMETER.
Without this perimeter, the exact thought disappears… literally, physically. We are not talking about magically vanishing like a cloud of mist into the rising sun. We are talking about being under an FMRI machine that used to see a circular shaped neural net and now sees what looks like a longer jagged shape. PHYSICALLY CHANGED THOUGHTS.
This perimeter is the exact point at which persuasion and influence takes place. Period.
In knowing and understanding this piece of information, we can now see where our efforts need to be focused while persuading.
- Understanding what exactly that perimeter consists of in their mind.
- What types of communication can we use in order to permeate and remold that perimeter.
In effect, we are looking to introduce new information that can and will remold and remodel that shape, size and quantity value of that neural nets perimeter. We have already spoken about this to a degree in my other posts on quantum linguistics. Tomorrow what I am going to do is introduce to you Sleight of Mouth Patterns and discuss a few to see how they work specifically to help change this perimeter.
To learn more about Sleight Of Mouth Patterns and other forms of effective communication, please visit my site The Communication Expert,or if I am online, please feel free to connect with me via Skype.